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Dating when you are an adult model …. :O

While talking with KittyWilde, AedanRayne and Lolli the other day on twitter the conversation was brought up to tell a person you are dating that you are in the adult industry and whatever comes along with that conversation…

Lots of people commented on this and I read a handful…I saw mostly non industry people saying to “tell them right away! why hide the truth!” “be honest and up front so you know they can handle it” “they may not trust you if you don’t tell them right away” and so on and so forth.

Then I saw a mixed review from some industry people but KittyWilde and Lolli came close to how I feel on this subject. And yes I have dated a handful of people during my time in the adult industry and feel (haughty haughty nose in the air) that I can gauge a good opinion on the situation.

I have had a wide range of reactions from people. Let me start with one where I was in a steady ish relationship and lived with the person so they were to know naturally. We knew each other well enough that is was something we assimilated into our lives rather than let get between us in any way. Long story short, it turned out fine, the person was apprehensive but curious in many ways…lets stop there. haha.

Moving on to another person I dated (again) that I had known since a young teenager. It was a reaction of “Why don’t you do something else, like your art?” but he was perfectly fine with the money I made and spent on him or whatever we decided to go and do. It’s okay sugar mamma for now but give it up someday okay? Dick… fuck you 🙂

*I’ve never been one to have a guy tell ME what to do LOL shocking huh? I just would break up with them. If I’m not the center of attention and in control you can trot on out of the arena*

This one is good…I casually dated a piano player. Good times we were both artistic so it was fun. But I had ideas that he was having relations with his ex gf on the other side of the state when he went home and even though we were never close to being official I don’t share. He thought it was great and would show pictures of me to all his friends… yay? Not so much. At the time I ignored it. Now I would be like my business is my business and if I share with you, you don’t share with all your friends. I will call this “I feel like a cool guy syndrome” Not the biggest fan of that.

I will end with one last guy I dated very briefly and you will see why. He could call me a prostitute (he did not mean that in a nice way) one minute (of which I have nothing against this type of adult but honestly have never done) and than the next he loved me so much and wanted to stay the night. What? Now I can laugh, at the time it was very confusing and emotionally damaging to be treated so bi polar in that manner. I cut all things off with him as he also had a drinking problem that would spur his meanness on as well. None of these things I knew about beforehand but found out very quickly. And left.

So there you have it, four people I dated in the past 7 years. I don’t do much dating these days. Mostly focused on center and taking care of my own. But the reactions from people vary drastically. From cool let me show all my friends, to you are a whore but lets be together…sometimes…all the time…you prostitute you!

Before I leave here, I will touch on the comments of the non industry people. First off, telling someone on the first, second or third date that you are in adult is pretty presumptuous. You don’t know each other that well, how do you  know he isn’t some serial killer or will stalk you if the dates don’t continue? Or tell all his friends about your private life. Neither of these situations benefit you.

Maybe the best conversation starter would be “Do you like porn” you know…if you decide to enter the bedroom together. Gauge how he feels about that and what he likes to watch.

Shut the fuck up, don’t be coy. Most people these days are fucking before they even get out of whatever place they met at. (I don’t do that. Never have never will because I like a healthy vagina) I even know people who ask a potential partner for a clean STD test before entering into sexual relations. (not a bad idea at all) But this is not about that. SO. Asking about porn if you are sexually active with someone should not be embarrassing. Especially if you’ve had their dick in your mouth.

Secondly telling someone on the first, second or third date about such a “taboo and sometimes touchy subject” you don’t know each other well, there is no basis for he or she to stay with you if they are on the fence. Would probably still go sour fast without any grounding to explore and see how things would work out.

Lets have a fake (reality based) conversation for a minute. First date. Girl does porn.
Woman: Hey just want to let you know, I’m in porn, I have sex for a living. Is this okay?
Multiple Answers.
Man Answer 1. Wow, yes, perfectly fine, no worries at all. (man in back of his mind, I can’t wait to see where this goes tonight, caaachoowww, going to tell allllll my friends! maybe even my mama!)
Man Answer 2. Um, well, my family is Catholic. I’m celibate till marriage… (Goes to bathroom and never returns)
Man Answers 3. Oh my god she probably has AIDS! (no I don’t think this of industry people but most non industry people are very naive that performers are tested every TWO WEEKS! Results are shared on a private date base and any issues are taken care of. When was the last time you were tested?)
Man Answer 4. Wow, can I see some of your work, so beautiful. What’s your five year plan? Marriage? Kids? (you can take this as creepy or genuine interest)

Let me tell you, most likely you are going to get the first three answers when you don’t know someone well at all.

I think you should have a steady 6-10 dates under your belt and maybe a good sex romp or two before bringing it up. (Show them a clean STD test! Yay for responsibility!) I do NOT think not letting such information lose right away is lying. If someone understands and knows where you are coming from at all they will completely understand that your safety and privacy come first over someone you do not know very well. And I know most you girls (maybe guys) have a good background story you tell most people who ask about your work. For me I would simply say I’m an artist.

I don’t believe hiding behind a veil forever because you are in adult is healthy but it is the cold hard truth that telling people such sensitive information can lead to reprocussions. Even just friends. I had a girl friend (case in point-that I did not now very long) who was totally cool with it when I told her and than 6 months later tells me GOD LOVES ME and I don’t have to do “this”.

By the way that is my favorite meme of all time. *laughs so hard*

The moral of this story is to choose your timing wisely. Surround yourself with positive, understanding and open minded people. I grew up in a religious home so what I do is very off the beaten path compared to what family would have preferred to see. But they love me just the same and my friends have stayed by my side throughout everything and I’ve learned to date and stay with someone who loves ME and isn’t here for my income, the sex or “who I’m online”. Know that a person can be that for you, before sharing everything.

That is my 2 cents and I’m sticking it in my piggy bank… Ciao!

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Cam Girl Tip Tuesday

Welcome to a new series on my blog! Every Tuesday I’m going to give cam/adult models tips I’ve learned over the years. I can’t give it all away but I can share a little bit *wink

Tip #1. Keep your cam space clean. It can look like a tornado or earthquake happened anywhere that is not in view of your cam screen. It is important to keep the focus on YOU. Not on that pile of dirty clothes in the corner, the toy blocks from junior or the fact you just plain forgot to wash your floors for 3 months. Your space needs to speak for you, calm, zen, clean. Ready to give all your attention to your customers. If you have to, throw or shove everything that is not fitting into the environment you want to create into a basket and set it outside the door/in a closet etc. Below is one of my favorite photos of all time. I will admit I’ve been guilty of this before. When one owns and juggles two businesses from home things can get a little hairy. But at least no one is seeing hair on my floors *wink

Search “cam girl tip tuesday” on my blog to find more tips, tricks and funny blog postings! XO

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Q/A !

Q: Cody Collier ‏@CodyCollier12 Nov 1

@MissVikkiLynn What do you think you like most about being a professional adult entertainer Miss Vikki? 🙂
A:  There are so many things I like about my career but a few that come to mind first are as follows. The freedom to choose my schedule is nice, I’m my own boss so I get to decide what gets done when. At the same time one has to be good at juggling your own schedules and deadlines-no one else is going to get anything done but myself!
I also love being able to speak with and meet so many different people around the world. Being in the world of fetish and erotica it is always evolving. To be at the forefront of experiencing and bringing to life peoples fantasies really is a lot of fun. I meet people I never would if it were not for my career in the adult industry.
I also get to wear lots of fun clothing, clothing I would probably never own or dream of trying on if I did not work in the adult industry. I’m gifted so many pretty dresses, lingerie and every day clothing. I love that my friends help grow my closet-this also lets me know what everyone else really likes too!PS: you can find more questions and answers by searching “Q/A” in the search bar on my blog!

Do you like shiny?

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Wet Look Leather Tight Black Dress.

The best gifts are the ones I ask for and actually need or want. Like this dress.

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Don’t you love to #spoilGoddess ?

You can do so yourself by sending an amazon gift card to: [email protected]

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Good morning.

I’ve been spending half this morning poking and prodding at the fire in the wood stove, adding wood and deciding if I should just get a blow torch at it….naw just kidding about the blow torch it would probably throw me backwards. This is becoming girl of the limberlost here with keeping this fire going. My test at self sufficiency has started-thank you universe-I did ask for it. As currently if you have not been following along I went to turn my furnace on for the first time and…crickets. Not from the evening music in the country but because it decided to die without notifying me first of its impending doom. We will have to work on those communication skills better next time…

So for now my only heat source is my wood stove. Real crazy that in mid September I need heat, September is suppose to be the month of mild temperatures, sweatpants and hoodies that make you go -sigh- isn’t this perfect? Instead mother nature has her own ideas…Rolling with the dropping temps here I had a consultation for new furnace and AC. Scheduled for tomorrow I do believe is when I will be getting to listen to the noises of installation of new units. And as that goes in over $7,000+ goes out. This is the only -sigh- happening. BUT I’m thankful I can pay for this, I save a lot, so there is no woe is me I’m broke story happening here. I’m smart, resourceful and calculative. This is when you tell me congratulations, high five me and beam at me. Proud right? Thought so.

I do believe I can write a portion of this off on my taxes because of this home business.

Then, I must apologize, I tried to get on cam the other night downstairs in the small remodeled portion of my basement. I would love to make it more dungeon like down there but handcuffing the guests to the bed at night may terrify them. So for now it’s nice, fluffy, white and calm. Opposite of how I felt after trying to cam down there the other night. The internet signal was just fine about a month ago when I decided to buy a bed/furnishings etc to the tune of $1,000 so that I could add a quiet night time work space. The daytime one has too many windows and no door and I like doors shut when I’m online I just feel more secluded…like in a little camming nest. (ha)

Anyways…I got all around, make up done, hair done, sexy outfit…sexy face on, was feeling frisky, taunting and ready to be a sex kitten. Then…internet…it took a vacation. Came back for a little tease…then gone again. I finagled with it for a good hour, even tried a booster that I installed. It decided one bar was as much as it had to give me that night. So alas, I had to retreat to the shower and sex kitten turned into frustration which meant it was time for bed. Tomorrow is always another day.

So the point of all that is…I still do not have a night time camming space. This is one reason you have not seen me online a lot. I’ve been in my new house 2 months now, insane how fast it’s gone already. I’m still adjusting and still trying to figure out what works best where and when here. So bear with me. I guess I’m kind of like the internet….back for a bit, such a tease…and gone again.

DEAL WITH IT!!! yep. I shouted. Terrifying I know. Time to call mommy.

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Me in HD.

No edits. No special affects. Just Me and My white paper lamp lights, little dress and sparkly heels. Perfect right? I thought so too…. *wink

These items are from C, My good wallet who loves to spoil Me. and I love it. *smiles

This was taken for fun after doing some custom HD photos with My Nikon in My new cam room. You can find out more about ordering your own special content by reading My blog page here: https://missvikkilynn.com/custom-videos/

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Ask and you shall receive…

Yesterday I had a Skype with a slave of Mine who always mentions being blackmailed and his wife finding out about what hes doing online. So this time around I took things to the next level since he kept really asking for it…I took out My camcorder and started recoding the Skype. He got super nervous, his voice changed and everything. (I’m just laughing and smirking) After I demanded he pay Me to not put the video on clips4sale. He said I did not give you any information about myself, I said they can hear your voice. Then I watched the recorded session and it was SO hot even from a different angel. I demanded he pay Me again because it would be such a great seller on clips4sale. Then I sent the video to him (finally) after I was done toying with him and making him pay Me twice. Of which he called Me crazy, (I laughed) but in a good way, that he loved the power I have over him. I told him he better watch the session and give Me permission to post it on clips4sale after. We shall see what happens…Stay tuned.

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Facebook likes to steal photos of Me.

For their own profit. Facebook is an evil giant, big brother government watching at it’s best. Delete your account if you have one and move on with your life-who wants facebook drama anyways?.Just follow My twitter…it’s much more fun! https://twitter.com/MissVikkiLynn

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